I first started working on my self esteem around the age of 14. I had Henry David Thoreau’s The Distant Drummer on my bedroom wall as well as the Desiderata. The Distant Drummer went something like, “If a man does not keep pace with his companions, perhaps it is because he hears a distant drum. Let him step to the music he hears, however measured or far away”. The first line of the Desiderata goes something like, “Go placidly amid the noise and haste and remember what peace there is in silence”. Though I didn’t understand a lot of what these 2 documents really meant it was my first exposure to what was possible.
My Dad drank every Friday and Saturday I can remember, growing up. He was an alcoholic who felt not good enough most of the time. I was a very good student in school for all the wrong reasons. I felt responsible for my parent’s marriage and was constantly looking for their approval. So, I was the “the good boy, people pleaser”
At age 23 I enrolled myself in the E.S.T. Training weekend. This was the beginning of really doing the inner work to increase my self esteem and self confidence. I spent 3 years in this community and spent thousands of dollars and thousands of hours “working on myself” participating in various workshops and seminars.
I also did 6 months of gestalt work, really learning how my feelings or to be more exact, my appropriate expression of my feelings play an important role in my overall well being. I did a lot of healing the past.
I then spent 2 years in the Sterling Movement, doing Men, Sex and Power, and being in a men’s group. This was the time the American Poet Robert Bly, was popularizing the men’s movement.
Finally I enrolled myself in 12 rebirthing sessions with a very good practitioner. Rebirthing is accessing the deeply held emotions in the body that are usually tied to our core beliefs. I then participated in the 6 month I.P.E.P. program - Intense Personal Evolution Program. This was my first experience working in a large group doing rebirthing, and learning the Course in Miracles. It was also my first exposure to Louis Hay and Shakti Gawain ( author of Creative Visualization). I did enormous healing of the past in this program. After graduation, I spent another 5 years in this rebirthing community, doing various workshops and seminars.
All in all it was about 11 years of my life completely immersed in increasing my self esteem, self confidence and healing the past. I then spent another 4 years integrating all that I had learned.
Today I am the proud owner of www.selfesteemhelpnow. My website is dedicated to everyone desiring to increase their self esteem and self confidence. It is now my turn to give back all that I have received in those 15 years of working on myself.
I look forward to working with anyone desiring a better life, in becoming a better person, and healing and letting go the past.
I personally following 2 maxims in life. Know yourself there is nothing else to seek and follow your bliss.
These 2 thoughts “sprang” forth from the family system therapist John Bradshaw. He once said “ the two most tragic events in life are going to your grave not knowing who you are and not doing what you love.”
The general philosophy I have on self esteem is this: until one takes full responsibility for oneself and one’s life, increasing self esteem is nearly impossible to do. This is because without taking full responsibility, we still feel like a victim to some degree. We feel like a victim of our parents, siblings, spouses, kids, government, jobs, careers, body etc etc. When we take responsibility, we stop being a victim, stop giving our power away, start the healing process, and then focus on what makes us genuinely happy. This is when self esteem really increases.
The best way to learn more about me is to visit my website www.selfesteemhelpnow.com. Here you will find more detailed information and powerful processes to help increase self esteem and self confidence.