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How Core Beliefs Run Your Life - For Good or BadFoolproof Ways to Use Assertiveness to Request a RaiseTips for Using Social Media in a Healthy Manner- True-Self: Do Some Peoples Childhoods Set Them Up To Be Preoccupied With Feeling Safe? - by Submitted on Aug 29, 2018 from Oliver JR CooperIt is often believed that self-esteem is the defining factor when it comes to how someone experiences life. So, if someone has a good amount of it there life will be fulfilling; whereas if they don’t their life won’t be. On one side will be someone who is living a life that is deeply ...
Views: 1140 - Do Other People Make Us Feel Stressed? - by Submitted on Aug 27, 2018 from Oliver JR CooperEarlier on, whilst I was out in a populated area, I overheard someone say to another person that they “stressed them out”. I had no idea why they said this to them, but there must have been a reason for it. It would be easy to conclude that the other person was behaving in a way that was ...
Views: 1051 - Critical Thinking: Is Ancestral Trauma Dividing Men And Women? - by Submitted on Sep 29, 2018 from Oliver JR CooperOne of the things that the mainstream likes to is to do portray all women as victims and all men as perpetrators. There are men and women who are happy to go along with this and there are men and women who are not. And regardless of whether someone is happy to go along with how the ...
Views: 818 - You Don't Come Through The World, The World Comes Through You - by Submitted on Aug 23, 2018 from Oliver JR CooperWhen I was speaking to Ben Ralston a number of weeks ago, he mentioned something that really made me think. Ben is a therapist and trainer of therapists, healer, advanced Sivananda Yoga teacher, and writer. We were talking about the self-image and he ended up touching upon a book that he had ...
Views: 710 - Why I avoid white boards during presentations - by Submitted on Aug 23, 2018 from Bennie NaudeTHE TREND White boards are popular among presenters, especially for corporate presentations. Here’s why I prefer to avoid them and use a flip-chart instead (also read here why I avoid PowerPoint: ...
Views: 1525 - Personal Power: Do Some Peoples Childhood Set Them Up Believe That They Are Powerless? - by Submitted on Aug 22, 2018 from Oliver JR CooperHaving a sense of personal power will be the only thing that some people have ever known; while there will be others who will only know what it feels like to feel totally powerless. Therefore, even though both types of people will live on the same planet, it will be as if they live on separate ...
Views: 767 - Critical Thinking: Is Being Offended A Way For Someone To Feel Significant? - by Submitted on Aug 21, 2018 from Oliver JR CooperNot a day goes by where hundreds, if not thousands, of people are not offended about something. This is something that can happen after they have watched a video or read something, for instance. And in addition to being offended themselves, they can also end up being offended on behalf of ...
Views: 896 - Seven reasons to stop being a doormat! - by Submitted on Aug 21, 2018 from Lynda HudsonPeople may be taking advantage of your good nature But perhaps you are letting them do it! Maybe you are too ready to say ‘yes’ when people ask you to do something even when it isn’t what you want. Or even when it is really inconvenient. You may begin to feel very resentful after a ...
Views: 958 - Emotional Awareness: Do Some People's Childhood Set Them Up To Ignore Their Own Pain? - by Submitted on Aug 19, 2018 from Oliver JR CooperIn the same way that a light will usually appear on the dashboard of a car when something isn’t right, someone will usually experience pain when something is not right. Through paying attention to this pain, they will be able to do something about it. On the one hand, there will be physical ...
Views: 842 - Being Seen: Can The Fear Of Being Seen Stop Someone From Reaching Out For Support? - by Submitted on Aug 12, 2018 from Oliver JR CooperIt has been said that a big part of success is simply turning up, and this shows how important it is to take the first step. If the first step is not taken, it won’t be possible for someone to get the ball rolling, so to speak. What typically stops someone from taking the first step is fear, ...
Views: 846 - What is my Truth? - by Submitted on Aug 11, 2018 from Sheryl PaulOn the last round of Open Your Heart a participant asked: “So if I don’t trust these anxious thoughts then what can I trust? If my truth was really that we are not right for each other then how would I know if I am teaching myself not to listen when doubts arise?” And then she wisely ...
Views: 849 - Leaf in the Wind Syndrome - by Submitted on Aug 11, 2018 from Sheryl Paul“I’m always comparing my relationship to other people’s relationships. Why does everyone else look like they’re so in love?” “I have such a hard time making decisions. Sometimes I can’t even decide what to order at a restaurant!” “I worry about whether or not my family likes my partner. I ...
Views: 820 - What If I Make a Mistake? - by Submitted on Aug 11, 2018 from Sheryl PaulWhen my boys were learning how to write, they would freeze in their tracks for fear of making a spelling mistake. Their perfectionist tendencies were not a surprise to my husband and I – after all, the apple doesn’t fall far from the tree – and it was both fascinating and painful to see how ...
Views: 719 - Child Development: Do Mothers Love Unconditionally And Fathers Love Conditionally? - by Submitted on Aug 11, 2018 from Oliver JR CooperIt is often said that there is the being and then there is the doing, and that both of these aspects are important. Therefore, if someone can only embrace one of these aspects, they are going to be out of balance. Another way to look at this dynamic would be to be to say that there is the ...
Views: 1047 - Being Present: Can The Fear Of Being Seen Stop Someone From Being Able To Be Present? - by Submitted on Aug 08, 2018 from Oliver JR CooperNumerous books have been written about the importance of being present and how to be present. These kinds of books can go into how the body is always in the moment but the mind, on the other hand, is always trying to be somewhere else. When someone is in the present moment, there is nothing ...
Views: 828 - Relationships: Why Are Some Men Only Interested In Women Who Need To Be Saved? - by Submitted on Aug 05, 2018 from Oliver JR CooperWhen a man and a woman are together, and they are both in touch with their power, there will be no need for one of them to try to rescue the other. They will both have boundaries and they won’t be carrying too much baggage. So, instead of seeing each other as competitors; they will be able ...
Views: 1406 - Critical Thinking: Why Do Some People Want To Save The World? - by Submitted on Aug 01, 2018 from Oliver JR CooperNowadays, it is not uncommon for someone to act as though it is their purpose to save the world. The world is then going to be in a mess and it will be up to them to do something about it. This could be something that will consume their whole life, meaning that it will be hard for them to ...
Views: 884 - When Will I Feel Better? - by Submitted on Jul 27, 2018 from Sheryl PaulWhen you’re neck-deep and soul-soaked in anxiety, when you’re having trouble eating, sleeping, and basically functioning, when the love you formally felt for your partner has been eclipsed by indifference, doubt, or numbness, when intrusive thoughts invade your brain day and night, you will ...
Views: 885 - Humans Beings Have Been Conditioned To Be Submissive - by Submitted on Jul 18, 2018 from Oliver JR CooperFrom a very young age most of us were taught to respect authority; it started with our parents, then went onto include our teachers, and continued with the people we worked for. There will also have been the government, the media, and there might have even been different religious leaders. ...
Views: 997 - Don’t Try To Save Or Rescue Anyone! - by Submitted on Jul 17, 2018 from Oliver JR CooperBefore I went on a Hoffman process introduction day, there was a moment when I had this sense that we would all be told not to try to rescue or save anyone during the day. I ended up putting this insight to one side. After I had been at this introduction day for about an hour or so, one of ...
Views: 1012 - Are You Playing A Role In Life? - by Submitted on Jul 15, 2018 from Oliver JR CooperSince I did the Hoffman process introduction day, I have been thinking about the roles that I used to play as a child. The reason for this is that this one was one of the things that we looked into. I came to see that I was often the peacemaker, the helper, the responsible one, and the ...
Views: 986 - I Went On A Hoffman Process Introduction Day - by Submitted on Jul 15, 2018 from Oliver JR CooperA little while ago, I ended up hearing about the Hoffman process and I was told that this was a powerful process. This was put forward as something that would allow someone to let go of the patterns in their life that are holding them back. I wanted to find out more about this process, and ...
Views: 930 - Critical Thinking: Was Everything Fine Before Trump Became President? - by Submitted on Jul 15, 2018 from Oliver JR CooperDue to Trump’s visit to England, he has received more media coverage than usual, and this has also meant that certain people have spent more time talking about him than they usually would. It is as though some people can’t stop thinking about Trump; their whole life appears to revolve around ...
Views: 941 - Don't Do Anything For Recognition! - by Submitted on Jul 13, 2018 from Oliver JR CooperAbout a month ago, I had a call from a publisher that was trying to sell me some kind of publishing package. This was a publisher that had contacted me a number of times in the past and, each time this took place, I made it clear that I was not willing to go down this route. After I spoke ...
Views: 920 - REALITY ISN’T WHAT YOU THINK! HOW COGNITIVE DISTORTIONS HARM US - by Submitted on Dec 19, 2018 from Darlene LancerWe all see reality through a personal lens shaped by our beliefs, culture, religion, and experiences. The movie Roshomon was a brilliant example of this, where three witnesses to a crime recount different versions of what happened. When couples argue, they usually can’t agree on the facts of ...
Views: 1000(3 votes) - Buy This And You Will Be Happy! - by Submitted on Jun 28, 2018 from Oliver JR CooperWhen I used to play football at school, I used to see other people wear expensive football boots - the ones that the professionals wore - and think about how good I would be if I had them. I thought that wearing these boots would instantly make me a better player. This showed that I had ...
Views: 1014 - You Can’t Save Your Parents! - by Submitted on Jun 28, 2018 from Oliver JR CooperWhen I first got into self-development, I shared a lot of what I had learnt with my parents. This was partly because I wanted to share what I had learnt and partly because I thought it could help them. I soon came to see that I was wasting my time, and that it was far better for me to keep ...
Views: 1034 - “I Want To Be With Someone Who Makes Me Look Good!” - by Submitted on Jun 28, 2018 from Oliver JR CooperOver the years I have heard people say that they want to be with someone who will make them look good. Additionally, there have been people who have wanted to take their partner out to “show them off”. There have even been moments in my own life when I have thought that being with woman ...
Views: 903 - “I Want To Help A Billion People!” - by Submitted on Jun 26, 2018 from Oliver JR CooperWhen I was out earlier I saw someone who reminded me of someone I spoke to a number of years ago. We spoke about a number of things, and one of the things I remember clearly is how they wanted to make a difference in the world. But, this was not something that they hadn’t really thought ...
Views: 885 - Why You Need More Than Confidence If You Want To Be Truly Successful - by Submitted on Jun 24, 2018 from Steven StasczakConfidence is the assuredness you have in your abilities to perform a task successfully. Confidence helps you win competitions, master new skills or become a company big shot. Confidence is a great ability to develop or to have but it is one dimensional and not too versatile. Confidence can lead ...
Views: 992 - You Sound Stupid When You Say That! - by Submitted on Jun 23, 2018 from Oliver JR CooperEarlier on I was listening to a conversation where one person was having a go at someone else. These were not just two strangers, though; they were two people who knew each other. One of them said something and the other person didn’t hear what was said, so they ended up saying “what?” a ...
Views: 828 - You Are Your Own Saviour! - by Submitted on Jun 21, 2018 from Oliver JR CooperAbout a week ago, I was looking through a book called ‘The Heart of the Soul: Emotional Awareness’ by Gary Zukav and Linda Francis. What first caught my attention was the book’s subtitle, and this was because I had used this term for the main title on a number of articles. It soon became ...
Views: 1250 - ABOUT AUTHENTICITY AND HOW TO FIND YOUR REAL SELF - by Submitted on Jun 21, 2018 from Sara FabianThis sentence rings the bell with me and with many women I’ve worked with: “I don’t know who I am anymore!” The question is: “Have you ever known who you really are?” We live in a society that puts high pressure on young girls and women to fit certain standards of intelligence and beauty. ...
Views: 1245 - We Are All On Our Own Path! - by Submitted on Jun 21, 2018 from Oliver JR CooperI was talking to someone the other day who was finding it hard to get through to another person in their life. They could see that this person was unable to make progress in an area of their life and this caused them to offer their advice. But while it was their intention to assist them, ...
Views: 893 - HOW TO HANDLE NARCISSISTIC ABUSE - by Submitted on Jun 16, 2018 from Darlene LancerWe’re all capable of abuse when we’re frustrated or hurt. We may be guilty of criticizing, judging, withholding, and controlling, but some abusers, including narcissists, take abuse to a different level. Narcissistic Abuse can be physical, mental, emotional, sexual, financial, and/or spiritual. ...
Views: 1560(2 votes) - "Did You Feel The Need To Tell Me You Were Gay?" - by Submitted on Jun 16, 2018 from Oliver JR CooperA number of years ago I developed a close friendship with someone, and while they had been with members of the opposite sex, they were now attracted to members of the same sex. This was something that became perfectly clear when they spoke about this area of their life, after we had been friends ...
Views: 1238 - “I Feel Invisible!” - by Submitted on Jun 15, 2018 from Oliver JR CooperIn the article titled ‘I Am The Centre Of The Universe!’, I primarily went into what can happen to someone if they were violated and made to feel insignificant as a child. Towards the end, I briefly touched upon another consequence of being treated in this way. To summarise; when someone was ...
Views: 1008 - "I Am The Centre Of The Universe!” - by Submitted on Jun 15, 2018 from Oliver JR CooperWhen I was out walking the other day, I was thinking about what can happen in someone’s adult years if they were violated and made to feel insignificant during their early years. What came to mind first was the kind of person who acts as though they are the centre of the universe. Through ...
Views: 1009 - Critical Thinking: Will The Drug Industry Love Danny Rose For Talking About His Depression? - by Submitted on Jun 09, 2018 from Oliver JR CooperRecently, an English professional footballer opened up about his battle with depression, and this ended up being big news in England. This was partly because he is a well-known footballer and partly because of what he spoke about. He said that there were three main reasons why he ended up in ...
Views: 960 - “You Only Like Me Because I’m Famous!” - by Submitted on May 31, 2018 from Oliver JR CooperA number of years ago I had the chance to meet a DJ and producer, and I ended up seeing them perform afterwards. This was an incredible night and a time in my life that I will never forget. At the time it was surreal, I couldn’t quite get my head around how this was taking place; I didn’t ...
Views: 804 - Is It A Surprise For Someone Who Is Popular To Be Lonely? - by Submitted on May 27, 2018 from Oliver JR CooperA few days ago I watched a short video about someone who lived a very lonely existence even though they were extremely popular. On the outside, they looked happy and as though they were connected to life, but when they were by themselves, they felt unhappy and disconnected. The image that ...
Views: 932 - Why Do Some People Only Care About Their Health When They’re Nearly Dead? - by Submitted on May 15, 2018 from Oliver JR CooperWhat I have thought about recently is why some people only pay attention to their health when they are in a really bad way. It’s a bit like only taking a car for a service when the engine is close to exploding. When something like this takes place, it is going to be clear that they have been ...
Views: 981 - If We Only Focus On What People Have Achieved, We Will Overlook What They Have Overcome! - by Submitted on May 14, 2018 from Oliver JR CooperAt the beginning of last year, I shared a quote about how someone can overlook what another person has overcome if they only focus on what they have achieved. The main reason I had created this quote was due to how people had responded to me, when I went into what I did in the past. After I ...
Views: 1009 - Being Able To Face Pain Is An Important Part Of Developing Self-Awareness - by Submitted on May 12, 2018 from Oliver JR CooperA little while ago, I was thinking about the role that pain plays when it comes to developing self-awareness and self-knowledge. I thought that if someone experiences pain and ends up reaching out for something to take their pain away, it is going to stop them from looking into why they feel the ...
Views: 1020 - Trauma Separates Us From Our True Essence! - by Submitted on May 09, 2018 from Oliver JR CooperI mediated a few weeks ago and this was something that I hadn’t done for a little while. But even though I hadn’t done this for a little while, I soon remembered how beneficial it was to mediate. I felt more at peace afterwards and it brought to my attention how different the mind is ...
Views: 876 - You Were Sent Here For A Reason! - by Submitted on May 06, 2018 from Oliver JR CooperYesterday a friend of mine called Ian Baillie gave a talk nearby, and this was about “Surviving and Thriving on Post-2012 Earth”. Along with this, he also went into a number of people who he knew and the lives that they had had in the past. I already knew a lot about what he said as we ...
Views: 991 - Empathy Is No Better Than Anger! - by Submitted on May 04, 2018 from Oliver JR CooperWhen I was at a bar the other night there was a scuffle; fortunately, no one was injured. I thought that this is what can happen when some people get drunk, they lose all self-control. Instead of being able to think about what they are doing and the consequences that may arise, they end ...
Views: 917 - The Guidance You Seek Is Within You! - by Submitted on May 02, 2018 from Oliver JR CooperWhen I was speaking to Errol Campbell a while back, he ended up talking about how one of his family member used to read tea leaves. When they did this, he said that they would say more or less say the same thing to everyone who had a reading. There was then nothing personal about the ...
Views: 890 - It’s Important To See People As Individuals! - by Submitted on Apr 30, 2018 from Oliver JR CooperJust under a month ago I was looking through a book called ‘Strengths Finder 2.0’ by Tom Rath. This is a book that gives someone the chance to find what their hidden talents are and to go over the ones they are already aware of. So, when I opened the book and looked at the contents page, I ...
Views: 1265 - A Child Can't Be Religious! - by Submitted on Apr 28, 2018 from Oliver JR CooperAs a boy I went to a Church of England school and this meant that there were occasions when I would have to go to church. Additionally, my father was a Christian and he was part of the church choir as a boy. However, I wasn’t forced to read the bible and to go to church every Sunday. This ...
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