Lately, a number of people in my life have discovered that the person they thought was totally devoted to them has been unfaithful. It has caused great pain for them. Each of us looks for love and when we think we have found it, we can often be later disappointed when we learn that our significant other has sought companionship elsewhere.

Recent statistics estimate that approximately one-half of all married men and women search for intimacy outside their marriage. Note that these numbers do not include the many other relationships where marriage is not involved but where there is still an expectation of commitment. In addition, most people who cheat will lie about their infidelity. Therefore, no one really knows the true numbers of people in troubled relationships, being unfaithful to their partners.

Regardless, it is evident there are numerous instances of such behavior. Therefore, it may be beneficial to examine this situation in more detail to determine why it is so prevalent and how to handle it effectively.
Why look elsewhere for companionship?

So why would a married person or someone already in a committed relationship seek physical or emotional companionship with another person? Indeed, if someone were truly happy in their marriage, or significant relationship, it would seem that they would not be hunting for something outside of it. Oftentimes, when questioned afterwards about their roaming activities, people will admit that the person they are currently involved with is not meeting their needs. Therefore, they look elsewhere.

Why is someone not meeting your needs?

Meeting the needs for you—what does this mean? Does this not signify a feeling of being unfulfilled, or empty? Cheating spouses and partners will often assert, after the fact, that they still love their significant other tremendously. So how you may ask, can someone feel their needs are unmet when they still ascertain they think the world of their significant other?

However, let us consider, for a moment, an idea. A relationship is simply a microcosm of a person's life, or reality. Therefore, if a man or woman feels that something is missing in a relationship, does that permit the feeling of being incomplete? Furthermore, if you are not whole, you must be outside of something, and lacking in some capacity. Yes, you love your spouse or partner. However, might something more profound be going on that may have added to your temptation to be untrue to your love?

A Solution

I discovered several years ago that I was reacting to certain situations because I had the reality that I was outside of everything. However, I have since determined that all of us are part of every aspect of God and the universe. How many of you have been taught that God is everywhere and that He is everything, encompassing all? If that is so, His light also includes us—we are part of Him and He is part of us.

Therefore, might it be more beneficial to recognize that each of us is already whole? Analyzing the statement from shaman Charles Crooks, "We are all part of the whole, and not separate" can offer an effective way to change your current reality. When you realize you are part of the whole of everything, you have the option of feeling full. Under these conditions, you may not stray for fulfillment outside, as everything is already there.

Practice Perfection

Numerous people have this same spiritual philosophy. Yet many, as discussed above, have had issues with betrayal of love. Therefore, why, on earth, would they stray?

It is important to recognize that all of us are human and as such, are subject to the physical temptations of this world. None of us, in the physical form, is perfect. Yes, we have the perfect spirit of God within us. However, the spiritual concept of wholeness needs constant support since the physical body is in a perpetual struggle to subdue the spirit within you. The intellect, or physical side of you, wishes to stop your spirit from coming forward as it sees it as a threat to the body. To be immune to the appeal of the physical senses, one must continually remain alert, without distractions. Therefore, it is beneficial to practice a daily regimen of communing with your spirit to keep you on target. You can easily accomplish this by meditation.

Refuting Actions

Another item to consider is that the path to spirituality is not easy. There are those dark forces in the universe who wish to suppress the perfect spirit of light within you. Those individuals who are working the spiritual path and who practice the constructive attributes of love, understanding, compassion, honor, honesty and humility are under more fierce attack from those destructive forces. This is a good explanation why you may witness many preachers, evangelists, and spiritual teachers having scandalous relationships.

However, the spiritual process is not one of judgment, but of love. Recognizing this can help all of humanity to remain focused on the goal of spiritual ascension. If you have cheated, look within to find the answers. The answer is there and, once found, can be a source of never-ending love. However, due to your physical limitations, it is important to look to that source daily to remember your connection to the whole. If you do, you may never feel the need to be unfaithful to your loved one again.

Copyright Statement

This article was written by Cindy L. Herb and may be reproduced on any related website provided the text is not changed in any form and this copyright statement is displayed unedited in its entirety at the foot of the article and you use the exact same HTML code to ensure a clickable link back to the author's site. Further articles are also available. Contact the author for more information. Copyright 2010 Cindy L. Herb, All Rights Reserved Worldwide.

Author's Bio: 

Cindy L. Herb, author of Awakening the Spirit: The Open Wide Like a Floozy Chronicles, specializes in Mind Body Spirit healing, with concentration on emotional healing for Rape Victims and Physical or Sexual Abuse Survivors. As an inspirational speaker, Cindy L. Herb offers others an alternative approach to healing from any trauma, allowing people to view life's tribulations as an opportunity for spiritual growth. To download your FREE report, Some Helpful Steps to Healing, please visit the author's website at