There are many reasons for getting divorced. Unfortunately, few of them can console a child who is going through the process. Even worse, many parents tend to push their children to the side while they deal with this often-complex kind of situation. If you have a child, though, you should make sure to put them first during a divorce. Below are three reasons why your children need to come first in all of your divorce decisions.
It's Not Their Fault
First and foremost, it's important to remember that your children didn't decide that your marriage is coming to an end. Whether it is amicable or not is irrelevant - your children are being thrust into a situation without their consent. Since they do not have any choice in the matter, it is only right that both parents owe them a certain amount of responsibility during the process. Don't forget that these children are about to have their world radically changed and that they have little to no say in what happens next.
How Your Treat Them Matters
The courts have seen it all when it comes to divorce and custody. They know that the way you treat your children during a divorce can speak volumes about your fitness as a parent. If you start using your children as bargaining chips or treating them poorly because of the stress of the divorce, it's possible that the court will question whether the children should be with you. If you want to make sure you get to see your children in the future, it is important that you put them first during all parts of the divorce proceedings. Work with a custody law firm like Kelm & Reuter, P.A. to ensure that your children are placed where they belong - and that you make decisions for the right reasons.
They Are Your Kids
Finally, and perhaps most importantly, your children are still your children. Whether you are moving on to a different life is irrelevant. You still have the same duty as a parent that you had before the divorce. Unless you are planning to give up all of your parental rights, it's important that you maintain a healthy relationship with the children even if your life is going a bit crazy. Don't forget that you still have to be a parent even after the divorce is over, so don't make any moves that will haunt you in the future.
Treating your child well during a divorce can make a huge difference. Not only will it impact their future, but it might impact what the court thinks about you. If you are going through a divorce, try to remember that your children are going through it with you.
Brooke Chaplan is a freelance writer and blogger. She lives and works out of her home in Los Lunas, New Mexico. She loves the outdoors and spends most her time hiking, biking, and gardening. For more information contact Brooke via Twitter @BrookeChaplan.
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