How to Let Bygones Be Bygones
In working with others, I coach clients and sponsees to find tools and answers to issues that prevent them from having the abundant life they want. Things that prevent us from living the life we want and can live are common.
Living in the past and collecting new garbage frequently is one of those issues.
Deep down you know that there is simply nothing you can do to change the past. No matter how many times you wish you'd done something differently, the past will always
remain the past.
You must find a way to, once and for all, be done with your regretful feelings. When you
continue to fret over the past, you allow negative feelings to consume more and more of
your life. Once you've put a stop to it, you can think positively again and your future will be brighter.
Getting Caught Up In The Past
It's easy to get caught up in the past. Nobody's perfect and, no matter how hard you try,
you'll still continue to make mistakes. It's how you handle the mistakes that will make the true difference in your life.
If you've made a mistake or suffered a tragedy in the recent past, don't allow the tragedy to replay in your head over and over. You'll continue to relive the negative feels as if you were continually going through the tragedy. No one deserves this! Instead, you have two choices, you can actively work on correcting your mistake, or you can let the feelings go because they're not helpful to you in that moment.
Learn From Your Mistakes
There are lessons to be learned in every mistake you make no matter how minor it might be. The goal is to work on discovering what these lessons are.
When negative feelings surround you regarding your past, focus on the lesson learned.
Maybe you would have never learned that lesson without the mistake. And now that you've gained this wisdom you can avoid making that mistake again in the future.
You can take everything one step further and do more with the lessons you've learned.
Perhaps you can raise awareness by telling others about your experience. If you can help others avoid the same mistakes, you'll be doing something great for the world. It'll also help you feel better about the situation.
Avoid Resentment
You need to do your best to avoid resentment and all negative emotions. Resentment is a poisonous emotion that can go out of control if you don't deal with it. You've
probably heard of people who have had a falling out with a family member and resentment keeps them apart for the better part of their lives. Think about all the good times they've missed out on because of this bitterness! Got any?
Let It Go
Depending on what you've gone through, there may be a mourning period associated with your situation, but you'll eventually need to let it go. Since you know that nothing can change the past, letting go can prove to be very liberating.
When you let it all go, you learn to forgive yourself and forgive others. Forgiveness is such an important thing to promote in your life. It allows you to grow as a person and
blossom forward to enjoy all that life has to offer. You weren't meant to sit around mourning the past no matter how tragic it's been for you. Forgiveness can be learned.
How Negative Thinking Hurts You
When it comes down to it, sometimes you keep telling yourself you're over it but the
negative thinking keeps creeping back into your life. You need to fully realize that the only person you're hurting is yourself.
Let's say you've hurt someone's feelings. You may think about this day and night until you can't take it anymore, and you have to seek this person out to apologize. The person might not even remember what happened, or they may just accept your apology. The point is you suffered with negative thoughts until you sought forgiveness.
There's no need to cause yourself severe suffering because you made a mistake, instead seek peace and resolution, then move forward with your head held high!
Is negative thinking hurting you today; sapping your energy?
You may find the tools learned through coaching and life recovery a help to living in the day.
www.hopeserenity.ca Certified Life and Addictions Coach
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