Would you like to honor your mom or grandma or even your great grandmother on their birthday or another special occasion? One of the best ways to do that is to create a Gratitude Vision Board or Tribute Board.
TOOL TO IMPROVE MOTHER AND DAUGHTER RELATIONSHIPS
As many of you know a Vision Board is a collage-type display that you can create simply by cutting pictures out of a magazine and mounting them on a posterboard. But to really honor your mom or to work on creating a stronger bond between mother and daughter or son. It's a great group project for children and dad or other family members to join together to honor female "mother" figures in their family. i
A Gratitude Board -- one which literally thanks your mom for all of the contributions she's made to your life is a terrific project to create for your own birthday or special day in your lives. Many of my clients tell me that it's a wonderful healing exercise for parents and children in the midst of separation or divorce. Once again a Gratitude board can simply be cut-outs that represent those things or activities in your life that you want to honor your mother for doing or being. In addition it can also serve as a roadmap for improving your mom and daughter or mom and son relationshp.
Visioning The Best Possible Relationship
In creating your Gratitude Board you'll want to look at those events, activities or memories of your mother that are most meaningful and fulfilling. They can be small things like when she put a bandage on a scraped knee or a song that she sang at bedtime or even playing a board game together.
One of the ways of remembering the best times -- yes, even if you've had a shaky relationship with your mom or feel you have much to forgive or resolve in your lives togther, is to take some time and make a list of the good in your life that you attribute to your mom.
THERE IS ALWAYS GOOD
Some adult children approach me in my group work and say that they can't find anything in their past to honor their mom with. Other times teens are so frustrated with their current mother and daughter or mother and son relationship that they can't see past the last argument they may have had with mom.
That's where pictures from the past help. Take a look at you as a baby and pictures of your mother holding you or even old home videos. It could be the smile on her face as she wraps you in a blanket or a chuckle you hear as she is watching you dive into a pool for the first time. You want to savor these small moments because it's by the moments that minutes are created and that hours develop and days and of course the sand in the hourglass of our lives.
Watch the videos or home movies or look through the pictures from the past with a small notepad or audio recorder by your side. Or you can use your mobile phone for hat purpose and either call yourself or take snapshots of what you see on screen.
As you're doing this jot down positive words that come to mind such as 'smile', 'love', 'caring', 'inspiring', 'well-meaning' and more. Be sure to create at least five or six of these key or power words that will guide you in designing the rest of your vision board or Gratitude collage.
If you really can't find any positive moments in your past relationship with mom -- then when a not so positive word comes to mind use the opposite of that. If you remember your mom as angry or upset with you or life, then change that upset feeling to acceptance or warmth or concern and put those words down to use as one of the stepping stones to resolving the relationship with mom or grandma or even great grandmother. Some of my clients find that doing this even though their moms have passed on or they are separated by miles or a break-up or divorce can be quite soothing and even inspiring in all of their other other relationships too.
HIGHLIGHT THE POWER WORDS OR KEY WORDS
You can look for these words in magazines and cut them out of headlines or you can actually add the words to your poster board with colored pens or even type them up in a really cool typestyle with a color that stands out from the crowd -- maybe a gorgeous violet or a vivid pink or a golden yellow if you want more sunny times with or in remembering mom.
Make the key or power words large -- but they don't all have to be the same color or same size or design of type. Some can be script, Others can be written in colored glitter glue such as silver or gold. And others can be handwritten with a felt marker pen.
Continue to follow these steps to actually create your vision board or gratitude collate.
1) Go back and gather together some pictures of you and your mom together throughout the years either real photographs from old albums that are falling apart or scan some photos that you may have framed already. Or find pictures in magazines or online that represent those positive experiences you want to create or the memories you wish you had from the past. Remember time is only an invention of humans. In reality the Universe is timeless and you can co-create your best possible relationships anytime and any place.
2) Check your supplies. Make sure you have the following on hand -- a) a posterboard -- if you don't have one you can use a bulletin board or a corkboard or the inside lid of a box that may have held the robe you game mom for Mother's day! The inside lid of a nice box -- becomes almost like a Shadow Box for the Vision Board creation. You can also use an old shadow box you may have on hand.
3) If you're working together with the rest of your family or brothers and sisters or even directly with your mom to co-create a 'better relationship' board together, you can gather up some colored markers or crayons and create together. Yes, even if you're all adults.
Remember to brainstorm some of the fun times you've had together with mom --here are some ideas a) going out to dinner or gardening with mom or making holiday cakes and cookies or even some of her favorite activities-- playng the piano, holding you as a baby or even finishing running her first marathon.
4) Paste the pictures on some colorful paper you line the inside of the birthday box you gave her or maybe the colored tissue paper (pink or green or yellow that you wrapped that robe with. You can use tape or glue to hold the paper in place. If you want double up the adhesive tape so that it sticks without seeing the bits of tape. OR if you don't have tape make some glue. OR if you don't have either mix a tiny bit of flour and water together and it will form some glue for you just be careful to use just a dot of it so that it doesn't show through. BUT If it does -- don't worry you can cover that with a sticker or a little design from your kids or you.
5)If you're not ready to revisit some of the memories from the past or your relationship with your mom is a bit rocky start with GRATITUDE -- t honor your mom's heritage and her life -- include pictures of her mother and grandmother. a copy of a map of the state she was born or the country where her family is from such as Mexico or France or Hungary. And include pictures of your mom throughout the years -- a picture (or copy of one when she was a kid) or a copy of a wedding picutre or a copy of a picture of her holding her first grandchild etc.
PERFECT FOR NURSING HOME OR ASSISTED LIVING:
This kind of remembrance Vision Board is ideal for moms who are in the hospital or a rest home or in assisted living where her roommates and visitors and nurses and attendants can see mom in her prime. Its a wonderful project that can also be jointly created while you're in the waiting room with your siblings during an operation for your mom or even when children and dad are together while mom is in giving birth.
Arrange the power words first and then add some pictures, then go ahead and add some embellishments such s stickers or even an old hairbow or hairpin from your past or maybe handprints or thumbprints you both place on the board after dipping into finger paints to savor the memories of doing this as a child with mom!
Then add your affirmations. Affirmations are positive statements of how you want your life to be from this moment forward. You can look up affirmations on the Internet to find some ones that fit your feelings or you can just add a quote or a line from a poem or song that fits how you want to show gratitude to mom or grandma.
Don't worry the boards can be a project in progress. Remember to take time to actually post or even frame your board and put it in a prominent place in your house or office or even in her hospital or assisted living area. If you want to keep your boards private you can have the board scanned at your local copy center and create a wallet size version or one for each of your siblings to frame and put into a lingerie or office drawer that is locked for privacy.
But remember to look at the board each day because it is literally the map to creating the best-possible relationship between you and your mom and it will aid in helping you put the best possible view on this bond.
For more information about creating vision boards go to www.visionbord.info and sign up for a free newsletter on vision board creation.
20 PAGES FROM THE VISION BOARD BOOK -- free Mother's Day Gift:
To see 20 pages free from the book The Vision Board: The Secret to an Extraordinary Life go to http://tinyurl.com/seeinsidebook
or see an additional free chapter at http://tinyurl.com/visionboardamazon
For questions or comments about creating vision boards for special occasions like Mother's Day please contact author Joyce Schwarz directly at thevisionboard@aol.com or joyceschwarz(at)gmail.com
For more free instructions and sample vision boards sign up for the free newsletter at www.visionboard.info.
To see the official website for THE VISION BOARD by Joyce Schwarz go to http://www.ihaveavision.org
Joyce Schwarz is a best-selling author and public speaker who wrote THE VISION BOARD: the secret to an extraordinary life which has been the top mystical book on Amazon.com for 22 weeks in 2009. She is in the process of launching the preview for the paperback edition of the book that will be published by Harper Collins Publishing, Collins Design in December, 2009. Schwarz is a recognized career strategist who has logged more than 50,000 hours of coaching and consulting for individuals and companies. She has been featured in the WALL STREET JOURNAL, LA TIMES on E Entertainment Television on PBS TV and on NPR and more than 100 other radio shows. You can get a free chapter of THE VISION BOARD book at http://tinyurl.com/seeinsiebook and see the official website for the book at www.ihaveavision.org. To reach Joyce Schwarz about becoming a Certified Vision Board Counselor or locating a counselor in your geographic area,email her directly at joyceschwarz@gmail.com Joyce Schwarz and THE VISION BOARD Institute are located in Marina Del Rey, California which is near Los Angeles but much closer to the beach and ocean!
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