I was in a conversation recently where a story was shared that was one of those WOW moments. It is one that proves the power of turning a resentment into a gift. I just had to pass this story on today.
My friend was sharing that his step-daughter is about to start her Ph.D. education working towards her Veterinarian degree. He shared that when he married his wife many years ago and with the step-daughter living with them; her biological father turned to a financial dead beat.
My friend had a huge resentment about having to take on the full financial burden of the step-daughter. He shared the story that one day when he was expressing his resentment someone told him: “What a blessing you have to be privileged to invest your money into the mind of a young person; especially one that loves you”.
My friend said it was like someone hitting him over the head with a 2x4. He realized he was so focused on the perceived injustice without the realization he was given a gift. He realized the feedback was spot on and shifted his perspective of resentment into gratitude.
It had me thinking of situations in my life where I have been given remarkable life gifts. I can honestly tell you that majority of them came with difficult times and lessons to be learned. In the midst of emotional pain the last thing I was thinking is that this situation is a gift.
For me, the turning point is always when I change my perspective. This occurs when I shift my thinking from “Look what is being done to me’ to “Look what is being done for me”.
I once had a consulting job that I grew to truly dislike. My values didn’t align with those of management and so I was always fighting an uphill battle on client relations. It was a resentment that just kept building over the years and I became a chronic complainer. I finally got to the point one day of realizing they were never going to change and I needed to make the decision to go along with their method of handling clients or leave the company.
I made the decision to change jobs and ended up in a new company whose value system aligned with my own. Of no surprise I flourished in this company environment. It took a while for my resentment of my old company to turn to gratitude. But it did overtime when I realized the powerful skill set I had learned as a consultant and that leaving led me to truly utilize the skills I had learned.
Debbi Dickinson is a professional woman who knows the struggles of integrating different aspects of
your life. Using her own life as living proof that extraordinary choices lead to an amazing life, she helps
other women do the same. She empowers other professional women not to compromise to live an
extraordinary life. For additional information, please join her at www.steppingintojoy.com
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