The Winter Olympics took place in Vancouver, BC this year. Athletes from all over the world have come to compete for the coveted “Gold” medallion; showing that they are the best in the world at their sport.

Having the Olympics in my own back yard (I live in Mission, just one hour east of Vancouver), started me thinking about the times I’ve gone for my own “Gold” and the number of times that I’ve failed. I’ve tried a number of different businesses: home party plans; network marketing, commodity trading, various sales jobs, management positions, etc. Also, I’m a registered nurse by profession and still work part time as a nurse.

I worked very hard at some of those businesses and spent a lot of money I didn’t have, trying to make them successful. So why weren’t they? There are many reasons: some good, some bad. For some of them, the timing wasn’t right. For some, I became disillusioned with the company or I decided that this was not what I wanted to do with my life. However, with a couple of businesses I gave everything I had, trying to make them successful. I put in the time, the effort and the money. I attended the sales training and motivational courses. I was taught by some of the motivational gurus of our time: Bob Proctor, Brian Tracey, Steven Covey. I did the Fire Walk with Tony Robbins!

I had all of the information – but there was no transformation! I should have been making money hand over fist. But an interesting thing kept happening. I would start to succeed and then I would start to sabotage. I had no idea why.

Now I know why. I had a negative belief system about my ability to succeed. I had no idea it was there but it affected everything I tried to do in life. I believed that I could not succeed; that I didn’t deserve to be successful; that I was a failure. And I had to be true to that belief system, no matter how untrue or negative it was. So every time I started to succeed, I found myself out of my comfort, or not comfortable but familiar, zone. I then unknowingly, started to sabotage my efforts, so that I could get back to where I subconsciously believed I belonged.

Each of us has a belief system about ourselves, usually instilled in our early childhood, before the age of awareness or understanding. For many of us, that belief system is negative. It was not instilled deliberately in most cases. Our parents were going through their own “stuff” and couldn’t give us what they didn’t have themselves. They did the best they knew how with the level of awareness and understanding they had at the time. But for many of us, our self esteem was damaged and we grew up with a negative belief system about ourselves.

How do you know if you have a negative belief system? Just look at the quality of your life: physically, socially, emotionally, financially, in your relationships or performance, etc. If there are problems, you have a negative belief system in that area. The problems will not be eliminated until you change that negative belief, because you have to be true to your belief system.

Although we are not responsible for creating them, we are responsible for continuing to live by them. Our parents may have “done it to us” but when we move away, we continue to do it to ourselves.

Once we stop blaming our parents, other people or circumstances for our problems and accept that we are responsible for what we do with the rest of our lives, the exciting news is that we can then develop the power to break that negative conditioning. We can create a better, more affirming belief system and finally be free to do, have or be what we want!

If you are ready to make a change in your life, I can help you do it.

Author's Bio: 

Sheryl Stanton is a registered nurse, stress relief specialist, speaker and trainer, as well as the author of three stress-relief books and DVD sets. She was chosen to receive the “Woman of Worth” Health and Wellness Award for 2010. She is available for interviews and can be reached by email:, by phone (604) 820 8439 or through her website: