Goal setting for the New Year can almost be referred to as a national pastime. Most people make New Year’s resolutions with the sincere conviction of making changes during the coming year. For some it could be losing weight, exercising more, for others it might be finally to stop smoking, move to a different place, make a career change,or have happier relationships.
Follow ups with people as to how they are doing with their resolutions show that most people start out enthusiastically and after a month very few continue with their resolutions. Life has gone back to the old familiar routine. The result is that life does not change. And many people may make the same resolution year after year sincerely believing that "this year" it will be different.
Have you heard the saying “A goal is nothing but a dream with a deadline”? Let’s look at that a bit more closely. A dream is the vision that we are capable of taking control of our life by stretching ourselves. The goals we set have to be made up of action steps so that we can achieve what we want for ourselves. Resolutions and goal setting are our way of believing in ourselves that we are always capable of more.
There are successful ways to make resolutions work. The key question to ask yourself is WHY am I setting this goal? The WHY is your vision of what you want for yourself. Goals are the action steps that make the vision a reality.
Let me share an example from my own life. For several years I had talked about getting more exercise. We even had a Nordic Track machine at home and by January 1st I had an ambitious program mapped out for myself. I got on the Nordic Track machine with great regularity. But after three weeks I became part of the statistic – a drop out. This pattern repeated itself several years with intermittent times during the year to use the Nordic Track. Again my enthusiasm did not last.
It wasn’t until I asked myself WHY I wanted to exercise that I was able to make consistent changes. The Why tapped into my vision – I wanted to be healthy as I aged. The reason for exercise now became part of a broader commitment to health. I joined a gym and have now for many years been steadfast in making exercise a regular part of my life. I also realized I much prefer walking outside to the Nordic Track machine.
The WHY question is the Vision of what we want for ourselves and the goal is made up of action steps that we create in order to achieve the vision.
When you are setting goals ask yourself"
1.Why did I pick this goal or goals?
2.Then identify your vision
3.Set up realistic action steps
4.Live in the present – the vision is a beacon but the joy is in the daily process of working your vision.
After you have figured out WHY you are setting goals come up with specific action steps.
•Write down your goals. The task of writing makes it much more real.Ask yourself why these goals important to you. Shift your thinking to your vision. If your vision is that you want to have your own business ask yourself WHY this is important to you.
•Then ask yourself are you willing to make an internal commitment to this specific goal. If you have more than one goal do this exercise for each.
•If yes, pick at the most two or three goals and start writing an action plan
•Make a weekly written plan of the specific action steps you will take this week. Think also as to where you want to be at the end of the year. That way you can see more clearly the action steps you need to create in order to be where you want to be at the end of the year.
•Live in the present and enjoy the process of growing toward what you want for yourself.
New Year’s resolutions are a great way to develop your self growth. Here are some questions to ask when deciding on goals.
1.Am I truly living the life I want?
2.Am I able to hold myself accountable so that I can create what I want in life?
3.Am I willing to take action to become the person I know I can become?
4.Am I being a love worthy companion?
As you answer these questions you will realize which goals matter a lot to you. Those are the ones that will be based on your values and when you pursue them you will continue to evolve as a person.
Kristina von Rosenvinge is a self-growth and relationship expert. She believes that when we develop ourselves we become better companions. Her other specialty is coaching people in their second half of life to have personal and business success.
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