For a large portion of my life, I have been an end-product oriented kind of guy. Success or failure was defined by the end results, period. If the end result was what I wanted, all was well. If not, it was considered a disaster.

I “failed” at baseball, having only made it to the college level. Never mind, the fact that I met so many wonderful people who had a most favorable impact on my life. This was insignificant. I “succeeded” at martial arts, having accumulated 3 black belts. . .the same black belts that are now collecting dust somewhere. So the story goes.

It is only recently, upon driving past a cemetery did my perspective begin to change. If I went according to my Golden Belief, this is the end result of life. This is where I would be receiving my next black belt, so to speak.

Something is just not right here. A grave is not the end result of life. And even if it is, that does not tell the story. It just tells you where to put the last punctuation mark. What about the story? What about my life? It is happening now, and it matters. Just like yours.

When I run a marathon, it is not the finish line that draws me back, year after year. It is the 26.2 miles in between. is the 300 or so miles of training, 5 months prior. It is the sweat, exhaustion and renewal that makes a difference in my life. In other words, it is not the product that matters. It is the process. It is the space in between the first cry and the last breath and matters. It is life that matters and life is a process, not an end result.

As such, I decided to quit.

I quit having goals, though you will be hard pressed to find a more motivated individual. I quit having “the end” in mind. I quit shining the spotlight on the product. My perceived success or failure will not define me.

Instead, I am beginning to fall in love with dancing with the Tao. I can always count on Her to present theatrics so I can learn, play and discover about life and about myself. Yes, this is what matters – the drama or the space between dramas. This is life, all of it, created by us for our enjoyment.

Of course, in the process of enjoying the process, the ultimate of ironies is occurring. More and more. . . and more. . .of my dreams, wants and desires are manifesting. Some quickly, as in warp speed. Others are taking their good ole’ time.

No problem. It just gives me more time to practice my dancing with the Tao.

Author's Bio: 

David Orman is a writer, coach and creator of the popular Doc Wellness Formula found at