Disappointed is not the word for it! Not at what his email contained, but at what it didn’t say.

Charles was a new friend, we'd met on a personal development course. He was American, I'm English Canadian, and we’d connected.

He told me he was a real estate investor. “I do it both for myself and for clients who enjoy amazing returns, but don’t have the time or expertise to manage their investments themselves.”

I was interested, and replied that I had some money to invest, let’s explore the possibilities. So we’d corresponded by email and yes, his proposal seemed attractive. It looked like a very viable investment.

The Golden Rule
However, I’ve been misled in the past by people who don't follow through on their word. My previous experience had highlighted the problem - people don’t treat you the way they would like you to treat them. They don’t realize the Golden Rule is just not esoteric theory when it says:

Do unto others as you would have them do unto you.

It actually has highly practical consequences which come from an unequivocal natural law - what goes around, comes around. And once I’d realized this was the cause of the problem, then the solution seemed obvious. Check first!

Are you Trustworthy?
My email asked Charles if he would agree to this vital principle in our dealings with each other.

But his reply just repeated the reasons why this investment was such a wonderful idea. And although I repeated my question, he again omitted any reference to my query.

He was unwilling to agree to this principle, so I passed on a potentially great investment.

Mind you, at least he had been honest. His self-sabotage was not as strong as it could have been. He did not say he was trustworthy - and then renege on his word!

Is it a good deal for both of you?
I had suggested we work somewhat differently to the normal "caveat emptor” principle. To change to a perspective in which the world be a better place. A more effective context that explicitly says:

You do not take advantage of anybody else.

Life Strategies does this. Now, when I choose to enter a deal, I want us both to win. So I only want to do it under the following conditions:

  • If you were in my shoes, if you knew all that I know about the deal, then you'd still go ahead. And
  • If I were in your shoes, and I knew all that you know about the deal, then I'd still go ahead.
  • Which means that whichever side of the deal you are on - my side, or your side - you would still do it, it's a win-win.

This ensures that, whether we view things from my side - or your side - it is a good deal. From both sides. For both of us.

I choose to be trustworthy, not to take advantage just because I may know something that you don't. Which mean you always get value for money.

It's better if I can also trust you. But even if you don't agree, I know where you stand, and can then decide appropriately. In this case, the risk was too high, and so I declined.

Of course, this does not discount the value of specialized knowledge, training, or capabilities. It does not mean you can't buy or sell your expertise, your time, or pay someone to teach you what you don't know. It means you're trustworthy, honest - they can rely on you and your word.

What happens when other people know you subscribe to the wisdom in these principles? You build relationships that prosper long-term. When relationships are built on mutual trust, how can they do otherwise?

Some Consequences are More Desirable than Others
This view of looking out for everyone, not just ourselves, is part of the new approach to life. One which, if our society is to solve its many problems, we would do well to adopt.

So, if you choose to work on this basis, then your world will work better. If not, then nothing much will change. But let others know if you are, or are not, willing to work on this principled basis, and then they can choose accordingly.

Remember that all actions have consequences, and some consequences are more desirable than others! Doesn't it make sense to only take actions which have desirable consequences. Just imagine, being able to fully trust all your business partners!

Trust has to start somewhere. As many, including President John F. Kennedy, have asked throughout the ages:

If not now, when? If not you, who?

© Copyright worldwide Cris Baker, www.LifeStrategies.net All rights reserved. Republishing welcomed under Creative Commons noncommercial no derivatives license preserving all links intact, so please +1 and share this widely!

Food for Thought

”To make the world a better place, make a better you!“
(Author unknown)

Author's Bio: 

Cris Baker has much practice in overcoming adversity, he's been screwing things up for years! Why suffer the consequences of your own mistakes? Now you can benefit from real knowledge, crucial know-how gained from his vast experience with extensive pain and suffering!

You'll find enormous joy in overcoming your self sabotage; check out the many secrets of success at Life Strategies and discover how to change your life!