A Dilemma-“WANT” vs. “NEED”
Things are said and life issues sometimes converge, and really cause the mind to ponder.
I have just gone through a situation like that, and it relates to work life/career equally to life recovery, life transformation and getting addiction help.
There is a huge difference between want and need. Please read on and I think you’ll understand. It may well help you to better understand the results you get and actions you take.
I will try to keep this concise.
I have found at this current time of my life I can get bored. I love my coaching practise, but to be honest, I am not getting enough work to keep me fully engaged mentally. Financially I don’t have to work, mentally I need to be challenged and feeling productive.
Summers are good; I love golf. Winters in Canada are long and cold. The golf ball doesn’t roll far in the snow!
I look into and trained for a commission job interfacing with people. I tried it, liked the people I met, but quickly realized I would not make any net money; that, and my personality was not a fit for their system. I could not colour within their lines and their lines had no flex.
Over this period, I took an older “recovery” friend to the doctor. She had successfully worked commission jobs all her life and I shared my dilemma with her.
She quickly told me my problem was want versus need- and boy did that make me think and then understand how right she was.
In the work situation, I genuinely wanted to do the job and do it well. When it became apparent that the job wasn’t quite as I had understood it to be, I wasn’t prepared to do the proverbial “go to any lengths” to make lousy money. While I wanted to work, my financial situation dictated, I didn’t have to run all over the country doing appointments that weren’t reasonably qualified. Because of a lack of “need” for money, I have given up the job. If I were in a position that I needed the job to eat, I would have continued in it, and eventually eked out my commission.
With some other issues that I am involved in, I certainly see a parallel.
I run into many people who want to change their lives and for all the right reasons. I don’t run into that many who see the need to change their lives. It becomes a “nice to do” as opposed to a “need to do”.
Guess what, most of those that just “want”, and are not prepared to do the hard work to make change fail. As an example, the success rate of people who sample traditional addiction recovery methods fail about 90% of the time. The same is true of people who longingly want to gain self-esteem.
Why is it that the success rate of people who put skin in the game is so much higher? Does the extra commitment increase need? In my work life I guarantee results with a few qualifiers, (client honesty, client does assigned work, keeps appointments). To date, I’ve never been asked for a refund.
I get a lot of flack from people who tell me I charge for what is given away. Obviously, with a success rate much higher than those who get it for free, including from myself, my clients have a “need”, not just a “want”.
I don’t care how people succeed, for those who want a better life I honestly hope they find it; I love those who need; they succeed if they go to any lengths.
I thank my friend for her patient explanation of “need” versus “want” to me. The work example I’ve paraphrased shows how it has impacted me.
How is “need versus “want” impacting your success and progress today?
www.coached-to-success.com or www.hopeserenity.ca)

Author's Bio: 

Keith is a Master Life Coach coaching intelligent people who want change and personal success in their lives and who are willing to invest time and money in themselves to get it. Total confidentiality assured.