HELP FOR REALTY REPAIR Rx?

HELP FOR REALTY REPAIR Rx?
By
Bill Cottringer

I am currently writing a book called "Reality Repair Rx: Making Things Better," which I feel is very important today given the extent and scope of the problems we are all currently facing (total overload). I recently published “Do What Matters Most” as an attempt to get sensible about this overload, but this book just contributed some more chaotic 500-pages to this overload! Hence this new, simpler attempt.

I think I have finally gotten my arms around what it is we are trying to do and how to do it—to learn the rules of how to be more successful in life and solve the constant problems that confront us at work and home and in our spare time—so we can close the gap between where we are and where we really want to be. But ‘reality’ gets in the way! By the way, I use the two critical concepts of ‘reality’ and ‘success’ frequently in the book and so I have defined them, along with the “7 rules of engagement” discussed next, in the attached book summary presentation for a test market.

What I am fairly certain of is that there are 7 fundamental rules that are necessary to believe, understand and follow which can help us be much more successful in the reality repairing business—making things better for us and others. This will be validated by their relevance to your life experiences. And I have found that the best way to communicate such basic truth is to use stories from real people about personal experiences at failing to find or follow the basic rules of something and how they finally made the positive changes that lead to more success. This is where you come in!

Here are the 7 “rules of engagement” (basic truths and principles), I have discovered that must be understood and followed for us to be more successful in our efforts to fix broken realities and create better ones. Is there one which speaks to you in a way well enough to inspire you to share your personal story about your own failure to “abide” by the rule and how you overcame it to be more successful? The stories can be as short as a few paragraphs or a page or so. Credit will be given for any contribution. And I’ll provide an example for one from my own life below, but it is by no means a blueprint to influence your content or style, because that will be all up to you to decide.

Rule # 1: The rules to be successful in life were established before the game began. A big part of our purpose for being here is to figure out these basic rules of life. We seem to be able to best do this by using our unique God-given talents to find and use these pre-established rules to be more successful in life in order to reap the rewards of ‘abundance’ (the substantial ‘stuff’ we want most—to be our best, be whole, get somewhere in life, make a difference and feel good about that), and to share the secrets with others. In Christian terms this is my own version of living The Good News and in other world religions, it is known as spiritual enlightenment.

Rule # 2: The creation of reality is still happening now. The predestined part life is the pre-established success rules and the free will part is making conscious choices to find and follow these success rules with our brains, hearts and hands. We are not passive observers, but active participants in the ongoing creative process.

Rule # 3: Our consciousness creates realities. How we think, feel and act affects reality in big ways; and when we slow down to notice the flavor and connection of these three things, we begin to get in touch with our power to be either fail or succeed in changing realities we don’t like and creating better ones.

Rule # 4: Personal desire is enemy # 1. Ego and pride, full of personal desire and expected gains of what we want, are huge obstacles in seeing and doing what matters most in being truly successful and making progress in repairing reality. We get nowhere but frustrated until we realize there is no “self” apart from everything else and become humble and reverent in re-joining others in what we are all trying to do.

Rule # 5: Today overload is the main problem. There is way too much to know and to do and not enough time to do much of anything. We have to find a legitimate short cut to sort through this total overload and do what matters most to get the results we need. We need to simplify, manage time better, and do the little things we can do to get the quickest and best results with the least side-effects.

Rule # 6: Purpose and Passion are very strong creating and healing forces. When you stop and rethink what your basic purpose is—whether you are trying to find your unique purpose in life or trying to find the purpose of what you are trying to do right now—you are cutting the overload of problems in half. And when you add passion to this purpose, you are doubling your chances for being successful in carrying out that purpose.

Rule # 7: Our emotions are the real key to success in life. It is critical to understand our emotions in order to find the path to be successful in our reality repair intentions and efforts. There are really only two categories of emotions—the positive varieties of love and the negative varieties of fear; and the positive feelings assure us we are going in the right direction whereas the negative ones are just trying to warn us to slow down and rethink our present approach.

My own example for all these rules:

My main challenges in life have been in trying to be successful in relationships and jobs. I have been involved in eight entirely different professional ‘careers’—military security, mental health counseling, prison administration, law enforcement, university teaching, building maintenance, private security business management, and writing. During these 8 different careers I have also been involved in eight domestic and marriage relationships, making the challenges even greater! Very few dull moments!

In looking back over these past 46 work and relationship years, something becomes very clear to me in the rear view mirror. When I failed it was because I either: (a) didn’t take the time to find out what the rules were (b) rebelled, didn’t follow the rules and tried to make up my own, or (c) tried to take illegitimate shortcuts to close the gap between where I was and where I wanted to be by cheating.

On the other hand, when I now succeed it is because I do take the time to find out the rules and then use my talents to follow them and get results by:

• Questioning my basic purpose in trying to do something until it becomes clear, unselfish and void of personal desire and expectations for certain outcomes.

• Not trying so darn hard and increasing patience when I hardly feel like it (Being afflicted with ADHD and dominated by immediate need gratification hasn’t been easy!)

• Showing my own passion driving me to carry out this noble and good purpose, without noisy talking.

• Seeing and accepting how bad things actually are—the size of the gap between where I am and where I want to be in what I am doing, and then saying “so what?” and resolving to be successful anyway.

• Opening up to seeing the advantage of the psychological nature of time to get more done, especially paying more attention to what I am doing right now and not thinking too far ahead.

• Becoming more sensitive to my feelings, especially as I get closer to the point of no return, before it comes and goes, and fine tuning my ability to distinguish between moments of opportunity vs. danger.

• Owning my own failures and focusing more on improving myself from inside-out in doing what matters most to be successful and not worrying about the other 95% uncontrollables.

• Constantly striving to replace layers of my selfish egocentricity with unselfish humility.

• Having the faith and hope that by following the rules, knowing my purpose and using my passion, I will be successful, just because it feels good.

Thank you,
Bill Cottringer
ckuretdoc@comcast.net