It’s so interesting to see the way people behave once they begin a spiritual path. As their awareness starts to blossom, they often feel compelled to reflect to those around them, the issues, faults and problems of others. The first thing we begin to see more clearly is the behavior of others, as our own personal behavior is more difficult to observe. This is because the ego mind is protective of its territory and does not want to be challenged, changed or usurped. It takes an open heart and mind to be able to train oneself to look inward and concentrate on oneself rather than what is happening “outside” of us.

A perfect example of this is when a disagreement occurs between two people. We may become frustrated with that person for not seeing things the way we feel they should be seen. When we feel we’re right, we project our inner energy of frustration and anger (which is the result of our judgmental thought forms) on the other person and they perceive that – usually unconsciously. They in turn start to react to the perceived judgment and become defensive. Then, we in turn feel compelled to let them know that they are behaving badly and that they have issues. However, we’re not taking responsibility for what we’re creating in that situation. We’ve been projecting our emotions outward and not recognizing what the result of that action is. The other person’s defensiveness is the result of OUR behavior and pointing out to them that they have issues is not awareness. That is using our spiritual path like a hammer to judge others with.

That's why it’s imperative that upon embarking on our spiritual path, we be very careful to avoid telling others what we feel they are doing. Instead we must focus on ourselves and what we’re creating with our words, emotions, judgments and opinions. This can be quite challenging because we’ve been domesticated by society to look outward all at all times; we believe that events are happening outside of us. This way of seeing the world causes us to take on a victim point of view, but in truth there is no outside of the one to be victimized by. Since everyone is part of the one, we are always co-creating life in billions of combinations, like a kaleidoscope. Still in the end, the other person’s side of the fence so to speak, is not our concern. Only what we are thinking, projecting and doing matters – as that is the only thing we can change.

I encourage you to deeply consider how you are projecting your energy, emotions, thoughts and feelings outward and what the possible reactions to your behavior might be. Rather than jumping to the conclusion that they are to blame, instead ask yourself: How am I co-creating this situation, and how am I compelling this person to react in this way with my projections? Let me know what you observe, you might be surprised!

As always, I wish you the best on your path.

Author's Bio: 

Sheri Rosenthal DPM is a master Toltec teacher and author of The Complete Idiot's Guide to Toltec Wisdom and Banish Mind Spam!. Having trained with don Miguel Ruiz, author of The Four Agreements®, she currently takes students on spiritual journeys works with personal apprentices and enjoys being extremely happy. You can reach her at or and